You are Unregistered, please register to gain Full access.    

New cases in Pous 2064, HIV = 175, AIDS = 26, Death = 2. HIV rate is very high in Housewives than sex workers in Nepal ! ! ! HIV status in Nepal till 2005: Total Adult=70000, Adult Prevalence (15-49)=0.55%, Number of Women (15-49) LWHA=15,310 (22%), HIV Prevalence rate in IDUs=32.7%, HIV prevalence rate in sex worker=3.8%, HIV prevalence rate in client of SW=2.1%. The latest U.N. report shows that 65 million people have been infected with HIV since it was first identified 25 years ago. Twenty five million people have died of AIDS.

Welcome to the xenoMED, an online Medical Community where Academically sound, Professionally conscious and Socially responsible Medical Students, Doctors & Health Professionals interact with each other globally.

Medicine is the only profession that incessantly tries to destroy its own existence. Howsoever you may be associated with basic and/or clinical medicine - student or professor, physician or surgeon, undergraduate or postgraduate - this is your place to share your knowledge, and learn more. Just get the message across!

You are currently viewing our communiy as a guest which gives you limited access to view most discussions and access our other features. By joining our free community you will have access to post topics, communicate privately with other members (PM), respond to polls, upload content and access many other special features. Registration is fast, simple and absolutely free so please, Join Our Medical Cummunity Today!

If you have any problems with the registration process or your account login, please contact us.
Go Back   xenoMED > The Lounge > Medical Humor
Medical Humor Share medical humors, jokes and funny incidence in the college, hospital...

Reply
 
LinkBack Thread Tools Search this Thread Display Modes
(#1 (permalink))
Old
Sarensa's Avatar
Sarensa is Offline
Senior Member
 
Images: 49
Blog Entries: 8
Thanks: 13
Thanked 245 Times in 238 Posts
Hospital charts - 11-05-2006, 11:05 PM

Actual writings on hospital charts:

1. She has no rigors or shaking chills , but her husband
states she was very hot in bed last night.

2. Patient has chest pain if she lies on her left side for
over a year.

3. On the second day the knee was better, and on the third
day it disappeared.

4. The patient is tearful and crying constantly. She also
appears to be depressed.

5. The patient has been depressed since she began seeing me
in 1993.

6. Discharge status: Alive but without my permission.

7. Healthy appearing decrepit 69 year old male, mentally
alert butforgetful.

8. The patient refused autopsy.

9. The patient has no previous history of suicides.

10. Patient has left white blood cells at another
hospital.

11. Patient's medical history has been remarkably
insignificant with only a 40 pound weight gain in the past
three days.

12. Patient had waffles for breakfast and anorexia for
lunch.

13. She is numb from her toes down.

14. While in ER, she was examined, x-rated and sent home.

15. The skin was moist and dry.

16. Occasional, constant infrequent headaches.

17. Patient was alert and unresponsive.

18. Rectal examination revealed a normal size thyroid.

19. She stated that she had been constipated for most of
her life, until she got a divorce.

20. I saw your patient today, who is still under our car
for physical therapy.

21. Both breasts are equal and reactive to light and
accommodation.

22. Examination of genitalia reveals that he is circus
sized.

23. The lab test indicated abnormal lover function.

24. The patient was to have a bowel resection. However, he
took a job as a stock broker instead.

25. Skin: somewhat pale but present.

26. The pelvic exam will be done later on the floor.

27. Patient was seen in consultation by Dr. Blank, who felt
we should sit on the abdomen and I agree.

28. Large brown stool ambulating in the hall.

29. Patient has two teenage children, but no other
abnormalities.


Sarensa
Kathmandu Medical College
Sinamangal, Kathmandu
Nepal
Reply With Quote
The Following User Says Thank You to Sarensa For This Useful Post:
RonSijm (19-08-2008)
(#2 (permalink))
Old
CSF's Avatar
CSF is Offline
Senior Member
 
Blog Entries: 3
Thanks: 5
Thanked 88 Times in 87 Posts
funny - 11-05-2006, 11:14 PM

hehehehe


  • I'm a clear, colorless fluid, contain small quantities of glucose and protein.
  • I fill the ventricles of the brain and the central canal of the spinal cord.
  • You can get me through Lumbar Puncture.
  • If I have White blood Cells or bacteria - Meningitis result.
Reply With Quote
The Following User Says Thank You to CSF For This Useful Post:
RonSijm (19-08-2008)
(#3 (permalink))
Old
de.malady's Avatar
de.malady is Offline
Senior Member
 
Thanks: 0
Thanked 100 Times in 98 Posts
12-05-2006, 03:56 AM

interestin hospital humor; thank ye -Sarensa-..


Reply With Quote
The Following User Says Thank You to de.malady For This Useful Post:
RonSijm (19-08-2008)
(#4 (permalink))
Old
Paranoid is Offline
Senior Member
 
Thanks: 0
Thanked 27 Times in 27 Posts
12-05-2006, 07:32 AM

nice one
Reply With Quote
The Following User Says Thank You to Paranoid For This Useful Post:
RonSijm (19-08-2008)
Reply


Thread Tools Search this Thread
Search this Thread:

Advanced Search
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are On


Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
IMG friendly Internal medicine hospitals usmlelover Residency 0 06-04-2006 06:12 AM
IMG friendly Hospital usmlelover Residency 0 06-04-2006 06:09 AM
Important Numbers Of Kathmandu Valley RAAZ General Talks 0 22-03-2006 11:09 PM
Hospital waste can cause serious health problems rajeeb Health News 2 01-01-2006 03:20 AM
The cases of Malaria and Poisoning in Mechi Zonal Hospital ! Mati Health News 0 14-12-2005 03:04 AM



Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.7.3
Copyright ©2000 - 2008, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
Content Relevant URLs by vBSEO 3.1.0
vBulletin Skin developed by: vBStyles.com
Copyright © 2005-2007 xenoMED, Kathmandu, Nepal
Hosted and Maintained by: