Funny: Shero-Sayari

[Pal]

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Duniya mein bewafaon ki kami nahin hai.
Ab suraj ko hi dekh lo-
Aata hai Usha ke saath,
Rehta hai Kiran ke saath,
Aur jaata hai Sandhya ke saath!

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A mad dog is chasing a sardar. The sardar laughs while running. Know why?
He says mera to Airtel hai phir bhi Hutch ka network follow kar raha hai.
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A for apple. B for bada apple. C for chota apple. D for dusra apple. E for ek aur apple.
F for fokat ka apple. G for gol apple. H for ho gaya na pet kharab khake itne apple.

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The positive thinking poem.
Little birdy in the sky,
You look up and it shits in your eye.
You don't mind and you don't cry,
You just thank God that cows don't fly.

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What do u call a fat woman waiting?
Moti-vating.

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Safed Sari Par Tum Lal Bindi Lagati Ho,
Khuda Kasam Ambulance Nazar Aati Ho,
Vo Ghayal Ko Lekar Jati Hai,
Tum Ghayal Kar Jati Ho!!!..

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[drekta]

That was a hillarious collection pal!!I had a great break after a long study period.Thanks!!

[medic]

Originally Posted by Pal

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Safed Sari Par Tum Lal Bindi Lagati Ho,
Khuda Kasam Ambulance Nazar Aati Ho,
Vo Ghayal Ko Lekar Jati Hai,
Tum Ghayal Kar Jati Ho!!!..

************************************************** *****

wah...wah...wah...!!!!kya sayari hai!!!
PAL kya tu bhi sayar hogaya lagta hai....
keep em comin........

[SUMAN-SAJAN]

ji haan ghayal karna to hamari aadat hai
tum ne jo hame ambulance kahi , tumhari sararat hai
jo hamare jakhm me marham lagane aati hai
wo to khud hi mar jate hai

[SUMAN-SAJAN]

baris ruke, tuphan bhi ruka
par patte hilte rahe
aap ki sayari ki mehafil me ,sayari khilte rahe
aap se naraj nahi thoda sa gam hai
mil na sake to kya huwa
hum xenomed pe to milte rahe

[Smile]

Maine tumhare yadon mein ro ro ke tub bhar diye
Maine tumhare yadon mein ro ro ke tub bhar diye
Magar tum itne bewafa nikle, ki naha ke chal diye


Maine tujhe dekha
Dekhta raha, Dekhta hi gaya
Phir mujhe chashma lag gaya


Gul Gaye Gulshan Gaye, Gul Ke Patte Rah Gaye
Gul Gaye Gulshan Gaye, Gul Ke Patte Rah Gaye
Sare Shayair Mar Gaye, Tum Ullu Ke Pathe Rah Gaye


Khud ko kar buland itnaa
Kay Himaalay ki choti pe jaa pahunche
Aur khuda tumse puche
Abe gadhe, ab utrega kaise


Birdy, birdy in the sky
Why you poo poo in my eye
I didn't sigh, i didn't cry
Thank God, Cow's don't fly !


Dharti se aasmaa tak, aasmaa se dharti tak
Dharti se aasmaa tak, aasmaa se dharti tak
Dharti se aasmaa tak, aasmaa se dharti tak
Dharti se aasmaa tak, aasmaa se dharti tak
[Audience: Are bhai, aage bhi to bolo.]
Hawa hi hawa hai.


Gam woh cheez hai
Gam woh cheez hai
Gam woh cheez hai
Jisse kagaz chipkaye jaate hain


Itni raat gaye Kyon apni qhabar khod raha hai Galib
Itni raat gaye kyon apni qhabar khod raha hai Galib
La, phawda muze de de !!


Maine tujhe pyar kiya, saraswati samajh kar
Maine tujhe pyar kiya, saraswati samajh kar
Tere baap ne mujhe pita, agarbattti samajh kar


Maine tujhe dekha,
handle badal badal kar
Tere baap ne mujhe peeta,
sandle badal badal kar


Kamaata nahin hun itni ke tujhe roze khilaoon
Kamaata nahin hun itni ke tujhe roze khilaoon
Aaati hai to aaa ja, ya kisi aur ko pataooon


Chandni raat thi, main so rahi thi
Phir kisi ne darwaza khutkhataya
Maine soncha mera dil aaya
Darwaza khol ker dekha to bijli ka bill aaaya


Woh jab chalti hai to raahon main 100-100 ke note bichata hoon
Woh jab chalti hai to raahon main 100-100 ke note bichata hoon
Woh chaali jati hai tab uthaa leta hoon

[orthodox]

here's one

Iis ashique ki had tumhe kya malum
hum khud ko jala lenge
tum nahi mili to kya hua janam
ham tumhari saheli se kaam chala lenge

[Smile]

really funny

[Smile]

Apni Aisi Wife Ho...

Apni aaisee wife ho,.
5'6" jiski height ho,
Jeans tight tight ho,
Chehra jiska bright ho,
Umar 22 se 27 ho,
Aise apni Wife ho.

Sadak per sab kaheN kya cute ho,
Bhir me sab kaheN side ho, side ho,
Pindi, Islamabad ya Peshawar ki paidaish ho,
Sas ki khidmat jiski khwahish ho
Aisi apni Wife ho.

Padosi jab baat karay to haath me knife ho,
Dinner ke waqt candle light ho,
Ham me tum me kabhi na koi fight ho,
Milnay ke baad dil delight ho,
Aise apni Wife ho.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
LARKI KA JAWAB
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

6'2" jiski height ho
Jeans dheeli magar body tight ho
Biwi ka her nakhra uthaye, itna mizaaj uska light ho
Husband apna aisa bright ho

Uff tak na kare itna quiet ho
Dinner banaye wo jab bhi romantic night ho
Shopping ker ke jab bhi aoon, bolay begum tum kitni nice ho
Husband apna aisa bright ho

Mujhay rani bana ker rakhay, to phir zindagi delight ho
Saas sussar ke samne kahay, jaan tum hamesha right ho
Hamesha jo haar maan jaye, jab bhi kabhi fight ho
Husband apna aisa bright ho

Jaha chahoon jaoon, jo chahy karoon, kuch is tarah ki life ho
Her doosray week ghoomne phirne ki flight ho
Aisa ho jaye to mein urron aasman mein, jaisay ke kite ho
Husband apna aisa bright ho


More Shers

Kon kehta hai pyaar may pakray jaeen gay?
Waqt aanay per behen bhai ban jaeen gay

Teray husn ki kia taareef karoo?tera bander jaisa mu
Teri zulfo ki kia tareef karoo?teray ek ek baal pe joon

Mohabbat mujhay un jawano se hai
Jo khatay peetay gharano se hain

Aj bagh may kali hai, kal gulaab ho ga
Mujh se shadi karlo,tum ko sawab ho ga

Itnay dino se jalanay nahi aya
Jalti hui aag ko bujhanay nahi aya
Kehta tha saath jiyen gay saath marain gay
Ab rooth gai hoon to ullu ka patha mananay bhi nahi aya.

Ghar se roz jata hai wo, Maa ko bohot rulata hai wo
Kambakht baap, Sab ko hi satata hai wo

Hathi nay kaha ja kar hathni ki kabar per
Sadqay jaoo tumhari patli kamar per

Tum bhi becahara,hum bhi becahara
Fittay mu tumhara,fittay mu hamara

Hum nay usay dekha angle badal kar
Us nay hamay mara sandle badal kar

Dil kay armaa aanso'oo may bah gaye
Un kay bachay hamay mamu kah gaye

Hum nay tumhay dil diya dildar samajh kar
Tum kha gaye is ko naswaar samajh kar

Dabbay may dabba dabbay may khargosh
Nana nay aankh mari nani behosh

Khuda karay sab haseenaao ke baap mar jaeen
Maut ka bahana ho aur hum in kay ghar jaeen

Ishq kay samander main ghota lagaya
Pani both thanda tha main bahar nikal aya

Un ki gali say guzray,ajab ittefaq tha
Unho nay phool phanka,gamla bhi saath tha

Log kehtay hain kayamat kay din marr jaeen gay
Hum bhi bohot chalaak hai,mangi thallay war jaeen gay

Wo ankh bari pyaari thi jo hum nay usay mari thi
Wo sandle bari bhari thi jo us nay hamay mari thi

Mera dil para hai loose Is ko matt karo tum use
Warna parain gay tum ko shoes

"Sahib Zaday kiya karte hain" Larki Waloon ne poocha
"Jab dekho farigh phirte hain ya tambako pite hain"
Larkay ki amman yeh bolin....kam kare us ki joti
"do bhai bhatta lete hain--abba khair se daku hain"

nakam muhabbat ka har eik dukh sehna..
.har haal main anjam se darte rehna
Qudrat ka barra anjam hai jaidi........
mehbooba ki olad ka "mamoon" kehna!

Rab na dikhaye
Tooba Tooba!
nanga pinda
nanga sina
bara kameena
Dish Antena

Ishq main fanni kharabi...........Munqata hi ho geya saab silsila
Is tarha toota hai un se wasta....jis tarha T.V main toote rabta

Rat ka waqt hai or masjid hai qareeb
uthiye jaldi se ke peghame amal laya hoon
ghar main hain filhal jitne bhi purane jote
aap bhi jake badal lain main badal aya hoon

or bhi chizain lut chuki hain dil ke sath
yeh batayen doston ne ishq farmane ke baad
is liye kamre ki eik eik chiz check karta hoon main
" eik tere ane se pehle eik tere jane ke baad"

bhains rakhne ka takalluf hamse ho sakta nahin
ham ne sokhe doodh ka dabba jo hai rakha hua
ghar main rakhain ghair mehrm ko mulazim kis liye
kam karne ke liye abba jo hai rakha hua


Utha kar phool ki patti, nazaakat se masal daali
Ishaarey se kaha Hum dil "Aisa" haal kartey hain

dil karta hai keh uss kay nazook hontoon koo chuum loonnnnn
magar uss kee behteee hooyee naak nay meraa iradaa hee badal diyaaa

chandni chand se hogi to sitaroon ka kiya ho ga
mohabbat eik se hogi to hazaroon ga kiya ho ga

koi batlaye.......jab yeh larkiyan...... baghawat nahin kar
saktin...........to mohobbat q karti hain ....

[Smile]

Kar diya izhare-ishq hamne telephone par,
laakh rupaye ki bat thi,
do rupaye main ho gayee (wah wah)

Maine tujhe dekha
Dekhta raha,
Dekhta hi gaya........
Phir mujhe chashma lag gaya

Aur bhi cheezain bahut see lut chuki hain dil ke saath
Ye bataya dooston ne ishq furmane ke baad;
Is liye kamre ki ek ek cheez "ckeck" karta hoon main
"Ek tere aane se pehle, ek tere jaane ke baad"

Taj Mahal kya cheez hai
main to usse bhi bada mahal banaoonga,
aree Mumtaz to marke dafan hui thi,
main to tujhe zinda hi dafna dunga.

KAASH TERE CHEHRE PE
CHICKENPOX KE DAAG HOTE
CHAND TO TUM HO HI
SITARE BHI SAATH HOTE

Jise samjha Leher Pepsi
Woh nikla Jeher Pepsi
Jise samjha Coca Cola
Woh nikla Dhoka Cola
Ab piyo Wine and ! Whisky
Life hoga No More Risky

(Warning: read this only if you can control your
laughter in Public Place.......)
Khidki khuli zulfein bikhri
Dilne kaha dildar nikla
Par haire meri footi kismat
Nahaya hua sardar nikla

Zindagi to hum bhi jee rahe the,
Taqdeer humari kharab nikli
Tajmahal hum bhi bana sakte the,
Mumtaz humari bewafa nikli

Kaash dil ki awaz ka itna asar ho jaaye
Hum unhe yaad karen
Aur unhe khabar ho jaaye

Kehte hain ki ISHQ main neend ud jaati hai
Koi humse bhi ishq kare
Khambhaqat neend bahut aati hai

Aansu ko ankhon ki
Dehliz pe laya na karo.
Apne dil ki halat
Kisiko bataya na karo.
Log mutthi bhar namak liye
Ghoom rahe hain
Apne zakhm kisiko
Dikhaya na karo.

Mohabbat ki shamma jalake to dekho,
Zara dil ki duniya saja kar to dekho,
Tumhe ho na jaaye mohabbat to kehna,
Zara humse nazaren milake to dekho.

Log ishq karte hain,
Bade shor ke saath.
Humne bhi kiya,
Bade zor ke saath.
Magar ab karenge,
Thoda gaur ke saath.
Kyonki kal usko dekha,
Kisi aur ke saath.

Tamam umar zindagi se door rahe,
Teri khushi ke liye tujse door rahe
Ab is se badkar wafa ki saza kya hogi
Ki tere hokar bhi tujse door rahe.

Ankhen apki ho, par ansu mere
Zindagi apki ho, par sanse meri
Dil apka ho, par dhadkan meri
Zindagi ke akhri mod par dua hogi yahi
Kafan apka ho, aur maut meri.

Jab bhi apse milne ki takdeer nazar ayi
Mujhe pavon main bandhi zanzeer nazar ayi
Teri yaad main nikal pade mere aansu
Har aansu main teri tasweer nazar ayi.

Talaash karo koyi tumhe mil jayega
Magar humari tarah tumhe kaun chahega
Zaroor koyi chahat ki nazar se tumhe dekhega
Magar hamara dil kahan se layega.
(waah waah, waah waah)

(Ha Ha Ha Ha)
Pyaar ke jaam ko aise na piyo ke
Adha piya aur adha chod diya
Yaron yeh pyaar hai pyaar
Nahin koi Vim Bar
Jo thodasa lagaya aur bas hogaya.......!!

Mohabbat ke gulshan main
tum woh phool ho
Jise log gulab kehte hain
Par tumhari bewafai main
Mujhe woh zaher mila
Jise log sharaab kehte hain

Dil jabse toot gaya
Kaise kahen kaise jeete hain
Kabhi jyada kabhi kam peete hain